The Kindness Movement

We will start this blog with a case scene.

Imagine waking up one day and checking your social media accounts (like most of us do, I am sure) and finding out that you are trending. You are trending because someone made a funny meme on you and now it is viral. You are shocked, aghast seeing this. You find it the topic of discussion in most of your whatsapp groups. People send messages asking - Have you seen this? The serious ones in your contacts urge you to take strict action against whosoever did this. The sensitive ones say that they have deleted the meme and won't forward it. The funny and casual ones tease you and tell you of their contribution in forwarding the meme. You are stunned. The meme is funny, sure, but it makes fun at your expense! You feel the need to disconnect from the social media for some time till the fervour dies down. And you exit from all the groups in whatsapp.

Take another case.

It is a re-union of your school friends and you attend it wearing a bold and revealing dress you are comfortable in. You enjoy with your friends and have a great time. Few days later you check the post in the FB page of your school where pictures of the re-union have been posted. You happily re-live the memories when you see the comments on you. These are comments from some other batch of the school, and not all are flattering. While some applaud you for your bold choice in the dress, there are some who are ripping you apart, calling you 'vulgar' and 'attention-seeking'. Then there are some lewd comments from some perverts too. You feel uncomfortable suddenly. And you close the site. But a little damage has already been done. Your mood has dimmed.

And now, imagine this happening to someone who is already feeling low and has been quietly battling depression since a while now. What if the meme, or the unflattering comments strike the final nail on him/her and drive that person to take some desperate measure??

These things are happening now, people. 

Funny memes are made on celebrities, insulting them and those memes are forwarded everywhere. The common public interact directly with the celebrities through various media and bash and troll them. Simply because they can. 

And this is not just about celebrities.

I feel that, for some reason, the social media makes us brave and reckless to hurt people, even those whom we care about, with whom we have spent our childhood or teenage. A slight difference of opinion with regards to politics or religion sparks a hot debate in Whatsapp group and ends up alienating those people who went to school together. It starts as an argument and then it takes a personal turn with people finding ways to hurt each other through 'messages'. I wonder whether they would fight and argue face-to-face as severely as they do online. Is the virtual presence a motivation to speak out without any consideration or thought for our own peace or for the feelings of the other? 

Is a difference of opinion a reason to turn our friends into people who dislike us? 

We are living in difficult times. The morale is low, tempers and frustration is high. The media contributes in creating panic as news channels keep showing 'the rising number of cases' every minute, every day. I wish they would find a positive way to share news. Like, just inform the number of recovered cases too! And like they show sad news with all the sad background music of violin, may be they could shout out the recovered cases in a manner of celebration and joy. Something that is grossly needed today. 

At such difficult times, it is imperative of us to practice every form of kindness. A smile, a friendly word, an encouraging and motivating sentence is all that is needed to brighten up someone's day. 

Locked at home and no one in contact with, there isn't much I can do to bring the change in people's mindsets. But there are certain things that I can do, and will do, and hope that you too would do them, dear reader.

Firstly, I am not going to forward any kind of meme that makes fun at someone's expense. Humour is essential in life but not if it hurts someone. If the meme is about a situation and doesn't target any individual, then I believe there is no harm in forwarding it. In fact it needs to be forwarded so that someone somewhere will have a good laugh, and it wont even be at anyone's expense! 

Secondly, I will not forward any un-verified news about the pandemic, or impending earthquakes, or end of the world. In fact, I will make sure to forward and post only positive news, news that will brighten up someone's mood and won't contribute to the raging inferno of the pandemic scare. 

I am going to refrain from posting any political or religious opinion in any groups. If anyone posts anything that I don't agree with, I won't comment on that. I will stay silent. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs and to each one, his/her own! I won't lose a friend simply over a difference of opinion.

And while I am not a big movie buff, I do wish that people would stop criticising movies or giving bad reviews. What didn't work for one, might work for another! If you loved a movie, then go ahead and give it a glowing review. But if you didn't like a movie, then there is no need to review it at all! May be someday it would come to pass that good movies get excellent review and the movies that didn't quite strike the mark won't be criticised or commented upon. It takes tremendous efforts, both for a good movie and a mediocre movie and ripping apart the movie or its cast kind of feels ruthless. Let us leave it at 'tough luck, wishing bright future ahead!'. I already do this with books. I am in a book-group and whenever I read a book that I loved, I give a good review about the same in the group. But if I didn't relate to a particular book, I don't write anything about it. As a wanna-be writer myself, I know what it takes to think, imagine and write it out. I have had my own share of flak and criticism, and I know what it can do to a writer. 

As the quote goes - 'Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle'. People suffer physically and mentally, and another unkind word or gesture can break them completely. Let us all be kind to everyone. While there are many forms of kindness, sometimes, the simplest form is to not say anything at all when the situation demands of you to be rude or unkind. Be kind to your family. Don't condemn or criticise. Encourage and inspire! 

So, what prompted this rant? 

There is something deeply painful about a 34 year old, super-talented, highly educated, philosophical, dreaming actor requesting his fans to watch his movies else he will be thrown out of Bollywood. He struggled, he failed to cope and he opted for the rope. And now the sighs and laments pour in from all sides saying - 'I wish I knew', ' I wish I was there', 'I wish I had reached out to you'. The time to reach out to your loved ones, the time to know your loved ones and the time to be there for your loved ones is - when they are alive!  Reach out to your family, your friends and be there for them always, so that they know that they are loved and cared for.

Be kind in every way you can!

So, reader, are you with me in The Kindness Movement? I hope you are, and I hope that you too will make your important contribution in making the world a better place, simply by being kind. If you can relate to this, and if this feels feasible to you, then please do share it with your loved ones and friends so that The Kindness Movement gets even more people in its caravan. 

Thank you reader, and I have to say, by writing this out, the gloom that had enveloped my mind since three days has taken off slightly and I feel hopeful. 

A dream unfulfilled is a tragedy.

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Arjun saw the next entry in the book and looked at the watch. He smiled. Like always, you chose your lunch break to meet me.

Rishi walked in with a guitar-case slung on his shoulders. Like always, he was wearing a cap and goggles. They did nothing to conceal his royal bearings. But these accessories, coupled with a plain shirt and jeans made him look like just another guy. Which he wasn't definitely.

He hailed from a wealthy family, uber-wealthy, actually. His father was a business moghul known all over the world for his successful business. There were already books written on him. Rishi's mother was a silent partner in all her husband's dealings and had already made her name in the world with the various charity projects that she handled. 

And here was Rishi, someone whom the world already knew as the heir apparent to a fortune.

"Hey, I brought lunch." Rishi said as he sat on the chair and placed the guitar case almost reverentially on the table. He took out a packet from his bag. A delicious aroma of North-Indian food wafted from the packet.

"Oh, I wish you would stop bringing me lunch. Is it necessary to bring this every time?" Arjun asked although his stomach rumbled.

"It is the least I can do." Rishi shrugged.

As Arjun opened the packet, Rishi took out his guitar from the case. He held it in the same way someone would hold a lover. Arjun smiled.

And then, as he did always, while Arjun had his lunch, Rishi played the guitar. Not only did he play it, he also sang along. His songs were composed by himself and carried depth and meaning. He sang really well.

But he aced the guitar. He played it so naturally that one could imagine that the guitar and Rishi were one. Arjun loved such afternoons. Having lunch and listening to really good music made  him feel as if he were in a themed restaurant and having a personal concert for himself.

The song finished.

"So, what do you say?" Rishi asked with a grin.

"You know what I would say. Amazing, just amazing. I just love your music, and your song." Arjun said sincerely.

Rishi beamed. His whole face lit up with happiness.

Arjun sighed. "Rishi, I don't understand why you won't.."

"Play the guitar openly, come out as a guitar-player? Thanks but no thanks. The first time I played the guitar at a family function, dad just killed my dream. I told this to you in our first session itself, right? What hurt me most was that he enjoyed the evening like every one, complimented me heartily. Just when I geared myself to inform him of making a career out of my passion, he called me to his room  after everyone had left. He forbade me totally to play it. Said it will divert me from my other duties - duties towards the family business that has been in the market since five decades. Said, no one from the family had gone into this kind of entertainment business and I was not to break the tradition. I was to just get into the family business like every guy or girl has done in my family."

Rishi's tone hardened in the end.

"I tried to convince him,  you know. I told him to listen to another of my performances. He did. And brought my hopes up. And then after I had finished playing, he took the guitar from my hand and dashed it to the ground. My first guitar - it just broke irreparably. I decided then and there to never ever play it before him."

Rishi tensed for a while. "Just to set the record straight, he doesn't know that I bought another guitar and I am playing it too. In fact, apart from you, nobody else knows. I just come to you because I need to perform in front of someone who will impartially judge my talent."

"And I keep telling you time and again, that what you are doing with the guitar is sheer magic. You are a natural guitarist, friend."

Rishi nodded and carefully placed the guitar inside the case. He started on his lunch.

Arjun took the opportunity to study him. When Rishi had first come to meet him, he had told that he was suffering from depressive thoughts. Gradually in the fourth session, the truth had come out that his dad had killed his dream of being a guitarist. Arjun couldn't understand what kind of hold his dad had over the guy. But then he gathered that being in the public eye as celebrities, the family had a name to protect, which must be the reason why Rishi didn't think of rebelling.

"Next week, I am off to this little village in Italy." Rishi said.

"Oh! Business trip?"

Rishi made a face. "Yeah. Another branch to be opened in the village. It is a tiny, remote village in the midst of nowhere. I am not sure how dad expects to open the branch and earn a profit too. Expects me to work miracles." He shook his head.

"Hmm.. Remote village in the midst of nowhere... seems like the perfect opportunity to go incognito and play the guitar." Arjun remarked casually.

Rishi stared at him.

"Are you really suggesting what I think you are?" He asked incredously.

Arjun shrugged. "Well, you need to check whether it is possible for you to do this. Seems like a good idea to me. You will get the satisfaction of having performed in front of an unsuspecting audience. I am not sure about the incognito part. That is something you have to think for yourself."

Rishi mused over it. Then he grinned suddenly. "You know, that sounds fabulous. Seems like something I can do. Let me think about it."

Arjun gave him a thumbs up. Soon, Rishi finished his lunch and they both cleaned the table.

"All right then, see you!" Rishi said, wearing his googles and his cap. Arjun's heart went out to him. The cost of being a celebrity! He walked him to the door and said 'All the best!'.

"I will send you the video hopefully." Rishi grinned and walked out with a swing in his step.

Psychiatries Diaries - The Housewife

You will never change your life until you change something you do daily.

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The next one to visit Arjun was Mrs.Sharma.

She stepped inside the cabin with the air of someone who had grown quite comfortable there. She gave him a full, warm smile and Arjun found himself smiling back at her. If he was allowed to have favourites, she would have made it to the top of the list.

She was one of those rare, blessed souls who were their own sunshine. She had such a positive aura that anyone who came into her vicinity was sure to feel calm. She always smiled, come what may. And that smile of hers added ounces to her natural beauty that came from a clean and pure heart.

So what was she doing in his cabin? Nothing. She felt the need for therapy because - she felt her life had grown dull. Monotonous. There was nothing exciting to look forward to.

And also because, she was unfortunate enough to land into a very difficult family, a family of people quick to anger, hurt and criticize, people who were battling their own inner demons and took out their rage and frustration on her.

Arjun could never understand what made her stay. Often he wished that she would find a way to break free from a place where she wasn't appreciated, where her presence was taken for granted. But as a psychiatrist, he wasn't supposed to directly influence people to take decisions. He could only assist them to think about what was good for them. What they did thereafter was solely at their discretion.

"Good morning, Arjun." She sat on the chair and smiled at him. She was one of those rare people who addressed him by his name.

"Good morning, Mrs.Sharma. And how is my favourite person today?" He asked brightly.

"Fine, and I know that you say this to every person you meet," She grinned at him and he laughed.

"No, not every person. But some people, for sure. So tell me, what is new. How have you been?"

"Things are going fine as usual." She said but there was something sad about her today. Her smile didn't quite reach her eyes, as Arjun observed.

"And yet your smile isn't as blinding as it is usually. Something is bothering you."

She gave him a resigned look that spoke volumes of how much she was hurting within.

"You know, today began as just another day. I did my chores as usual and tried not to give any reason to anyone to complain or fret."

You don't have to do that... Arjun thought sadly.

"Anyways, it so happened that someone from the family taunted me today, about not contributing financially to the home."

Arjun really wished she would disclose more about her family. She never mentioned the people who ill-treated her. It was always 'someone'.

"You are raising your daughter, looking after the elders, and taking care of the whole family. Doesn't this matter more than any kind of financial contribution?" Arjun asked gently.

She smiled and nodded her head. Cleared her throat and went on. "Well, I spoke to my husband and he said - By now you are already used to it, aren't you."

She paused. For few minutes, no one spoke.

"I think something else is troubling you. This is not the only matter, am I right?"

Her face was now a picture of sheer hurt. She spoke slowly. "Before that someone taunted me, they made sure that they had my complete attention."

"I didn't understand."

"I was engrossed in some work when they stood behind me. They waited till I finished my work and looked around at them. And then they hurled the taunt on me."

"What bothers you most about this?"

"The pause. They paused, just so that I can fully bear the effect of their words. Couldn't that pause helped them to reflect on what they were going to say, and why? They paused, Arjun, so that they could ensure that I would definitely feel the sting of the taunt. I can't help thinking how much they must have willed to hurt me. I wish I knew why. "

Arjun didn't say anything, for he sensed that more was to come.

"And then, when my husband said that I am already used to it... It was the truth, you know.. Somehow I became used to being disrespected, being ill-treated, being shouted at. And it disgusted me, for the first time. I am feeling angry with myself for getting used to this kind of treatment."

There were tears in her eyes but Arjun felt immense relief. May be there is hope for you now...

She needed to cry it out, so Arjun got up from his seat and walked towards the window of the cabin. He looked down and the busy road teeming with vehicles and people. How many of you are suffering silently, he thought sadly. He turned back and saw that Mrs.Sharma seemed composed now. He walked back towards his chair and handed over a glass of water to her. She smiled gratefully at him and took the glass.

"I am sorry, I am not usually the one to complain, you know. I just assumed that whatever I was feeling was just some kind of mid-life crisis. But it seems to have deeper roots." She sniffed.

"Okay, first things first, you don't look one bit middle-aged. If nothing, you look like you are in the prime of your youth." This made her smile, which was his intention.

"And secondly, it is okay to cry, to complain at times. The more you keep everything bottled up, the more you will feel the impact when all the pent-up emotions get released. So, you can complain and cry, that's why I am here."

She looked at him sadly. "I wish I could know what I can do know. I mean, I am in my forties. My whole life has gone by in serving my family, before and after my marriage. I guess I never spared a thought for myself. What can I possibly do now?"

Arjun thought for a while. He suddenly brightened up, for he had found a way to make her think about herself for a change.

"I will give you an assignment. Will you do it?" He asked eagerly.

"What would it require from me?" She asked hesitatingly.

"Nothing! Just a few precious minutes of your time. I want you to buy a nice notebook, something with a pretty cover that you like. And your favourite pen."

She looked at him in confusion.

"And name it as your Dream Journal. And for the first entry, you have to answer this question - If there were no limitations, no objections, no hurdles, what are the things you would like to do? You have to answer this with the assumption that for now, you are totally on your alone, with no one to stop you, or judge you, no hurdles at all. Just unlimited freedom and resources to do whatever you want to do. What all things would you do then? Prepare a list. There are no limitations for the number of entries. Can you do this?"

She thought for a while and straightened up. "Wow, I have never even thought about what I wanted. I guess this should be a fun exercise. Yeah, this feels like something I can do."

"Great! Show it to me the next time you come here. We can then decide about how to proceed ahead."

"All right then. I guess this is all for today." She said and got up from her seat. He walked with her to the door.

She turned around and looked at him with a bright smile. "I am so excited - all the things I want to do! I can now think about them. It feels soothing already."

"This is just the beginning. Gear up, for some really great things are on your way from now." Arjun said warmly. As he saw her walk with a new vigour in her step, he smiled from within. She had already taken the first step by realizing that she deserved better. Now he just had to help her know what she really wanted from life.

Psychiatrist Diaries - The Lonely Aged Man

I am not alone because loneliness is always with me.
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The next person to walk in was Mr.Kapoor.

Arjun greeted him warmly and like always, secretly wished that he too could age as gracefully as Mr.Kapoor. At the age of seventy, the senior still retained his tall and unbent physique and looked every bit classy and regal. Tanned face still unmarked by the vistage of time, thick white hair neatly combed to a side and the cane in hand completed the whole picture.

"Good morning, Son." Just another reason why Arjun had immediately warmed up to the senior. Very few people addressed him so.

"Let me order tea for us. I have missed your regular visits." Arjun called up the tea-vendor who had his stall opposite to his office and ordered tea. Mr.Kapoor waited patiently till Arjun had finished the call.

"I feel like I take up too much of your time. And then you go the extra mile to order tea or something else, always. I feel like I bother you." Mr.Kapoor said with a slight smile.

"Oh not at all, Mr.Kapoor! It is sheer delight to talk with you, I assure you. Now tell me how have you been doing, Sir?"

Mr.Kapoor sat up straighter in his seat and cleared his throat. "Well, I searched for a retirement home for me."

Before Arjun could react, there was a knock on his door and a man walked in with two glasses of tea. He greeted both Arjun and Mr.Kapoor, chatted with the senior for a few minutes and left.

Arjun sipped on his tea. It was delicious. "So what made you finally do this, Sir?"

Mr.Kapoor took his own time to reply. His fingers shook a little as he lifted the glass. "It has been due since a long time, this decision to move out. I have the perfect family anyone could ask for, you know. My son, my daughter-in-law and grand-daughter love me, and take care of me. I couldn't have asked for a better home to live in."

Arjun waited for the 'But..' that he knew would come.

"But it is not the same after Mrs.Kapoor passed away." Mr.Kapoor's voice quivered a little at the mention of his late wife. "Inspite of being surrounded by the best family I could hope for, I still feel like I don't belong there. I belong with Mrs. Kapoor. We were a team, we were supposed to stay together. She shouldn't have bailed out on me like this." Mr.Kapoor's eyes teared up a little and he looked towards a window from where the clear sky was visible.

Arjun allowed the senior some time to sober up. "What can I do to make this easier for you, Sir?" He asked gently and earnestly.

"Oh you have already done, son! My sessions with you since Mrs.Kapoor's death have helped me to cope with the grief. But I don't want the grief to end. She was one of a kind, you know. Loved me so deeply, and I loved her too. Her life deserves to be both celebrated and grieved. You never, ever stop grieving for someone like her."

"I can understand, Sir. Grief is a natural mechanism for the heart to heal. I am not saying that you should not grieve. I am just telling you to find a way to live peacefully, inspite of your grief."

Mr.Kapoor nodded thoughtfully. "Yes, and I don't feel at peace in my own house. And that is why I need to leave. I need to be in solitude, and yet among people whom I can relate to. The people in the retirement homes have lived their lives, like me. I feel connected to them already. And when you are at a place where you aren't much familiar with the people, you get both solitude and company. That is why I decided to move out."

Mr.Kapoor fumbled inside his bag, searching for something. Arjun waited patiently. Soon enough, the senior took out a brochure and gave it to Arjun. It was a brochure advertising the retirement home. It looked blissful, with individual little cottages, a temple, enough tracks for walking, an ampitheatre where some functions could be held and other necessities like ATM, medical store and a super-market. It was impressive enough.

"Have you discussed this with your son?" Arjun asked.

"Yes, I had discussed this with him much before our therapy sessions began. He wanted me to heal first, before being on my own. He understood my need for solitude and peace. The retirement home that I have chosen is in the same city, so I won't be away from him."

Arjun nodded and handed over the brochure to Mr.Kapoor. "Whatever makes you peaceful from within, Sir.. We all just want you to live a happy life."

"Happiness.. that is long gone. It went away with Mrs.Kapoor. I was happy when she was around. What hurts the most is, she was so healthy and in the prime of her life. One evening, we both are playing Ludo and I lose badly to her. I even get a bit cranky because of that. And that night, she decides to pass away in her sleep. A heart-attack, they said. I can't help feeling whether she felt any pain. Did she call out to me and I was too deep in sleep to hear? I can't help thinking about this."

"You cannot stress over questions which do not have any answer, Sir. The fact is, Mrs.Kapoor has passed away. And you still have a life to live, to lead and to inspire. Find the thing that motivates  you to wake up every morning, Sir. Physically, you are fine, faring much better than most of the seniors today. Mentally, you need to accept and move on. Life is precious, Sir, and needs to be lived fully."

"Yes." Mr.Kapoor said without any feeling. He got up slowly. "I will come to meet you again before I leave for the home. Once I go there..." Mr.Kapoor looked doubtful for the first time since his visit.

"Once you go there, you can still come and meet me anytime, Sir. I will miss our tea sessions together." Arjun smiled.

"Okay, I feel better. You are a good person, Arjun. Your parents must be so proud of you."

Arjun beamed, feeling grateful that both his parents were still hale and hearty and very much together. He got up from his seat to escort the senior outside.

"Have you ever seen or heard about the telecom, The Golden Girls?" Mr.Kapoor asked out of the blue.

"Yes, I have heard about it. But I haven't seen any episode."

Mr.Kapoor paused at the door of the cabin. "You know, it was Mrs.Kapoor's favourite, and I started watching it yesterday. There is this senior named Rose, and she said something very meaningful and deep. She said - We are old, and alone, and there is a lot of life ahead." He took a deep breath. "That is exactly how I feel, Son." He patted Arjun's shoulder and walked slowly towards the exit.

Arjun looked at his retreating back, realising that no amount of therapy could heal the feeling of loss and loneliness that old age brought sometimes.

Psychiatrist Diaries - The Rape Survivor

Experience taught her, hurt raised her; neither defined her.

Arjun entered his room and breathed in the familiar and comforting air around him. Unknowingly, this had become his second home, a much-loved place, a place where he felt calm and balanced.

It was ironical, his friends always said. How can a psychiatrist's cabin make anyone feel calm and balanced, they always asked. Don't you get frustrated by all the troubles your clients load on you? His friends asked him time and again.

How could he explain? He owed his calm and balanced mindset to his clients. He was required to be strong and non-judgemental for their sake, and so he did. With time, his cabin became the oasis of calm and peace. Many of his clients said that just by entering inside, they felt calm within. And to the second question that his friends asked always, he liked to say that the somewhat care-free and relieved patient walking out of his cabin was worth every dime of trouble.

He checked his appointment book and saw the first customer's name. He sobered up a little. She was a rape survivor, and her appointment wasn't due till another week. He hoped her sudden need for appointment wasn't anything serious. She had been responding well to therapy till now.

Half-n-hour later, Arjun heard a hesitating knock on the door and knew it was her. True enough, she shyly peeped inside and asked, 'May I?'.

"Please, Ms.Rucha, come inside."

She sat on the chair opposite to him and fiddled a while with her purse, searching for something. He gave her enough time to settle down. This was how she usually prepared herself to talk to him. After a while, when she was comfortable enough, she faced him. Arjun tried to read her mood. She seemed calm enough.

"So, I went to the jail yesterday. To meet him." She said. By 'him', she was referring to the rapist.

"Oh!" Arjun said, taken aback slightly. He would have wanted her to meet him first before meeting the rapist. He would have helped her to mentally prepare herself for the task. "How did it go?"

She shrugged. Arjun allowed himself the usual despair and anger that he felt whenever he thought about the incident that had broken her spirit completely. It was dreadful enough that she had been raped, the aftermath had resulted in name slandering and dragging to the courts. It took two months for the culprit to land behind bars. But her life had been altered forever.

Life was unfair, and how! It made him all the more determined to make it easier for as many people as he could.

"It was okay." She said.

He waited for her to elaborate. He knew that pushing her to talk never achieved anything. The first three sessions of her therapy had gone by with her not uttering a single word. In the fourth session, Arjun had sat silently until she herself had started speaking. Most of the session had gone by in crying, but that was still a beginning. She had come a long way since then.

She took a deep breath. "The idea came to me that day when I was just lying down and thinking about.. you know. Something inside me told me to meet him once. I didn't know what good or bad it would do, the meeting with him. I simply went by my instinct. It was more like, better to deal with it when I still have the courage and the readiness."

"Okay. That's good." Arjun said and waited, hoping that she would confide in him about the meeting.

She didn't disappoint him. "The next day I got up with the mission of meeting him, once and for all. I thought it would make me nervous, but it didn't. Rather, there was an urgency in me, to get this done immediately. It felt like it would give me the necessary closure to this mental trauma that I have been fighting with."

Arjun nodded encouragingly.

"When I entered the prison, I didn't feel any jitters. I was thoroughly prepared to meet him. And I did."

"What happened then?"

"We met, with him behind the bars and myself standing outside. I couldn't ask him anything, nor could I shout. I just stared at him, hoping that I would get some kind of answer, as to why he did it. Why couldn't my screams and pleas move him?? How could he do such a savage act?"

A month ago, just saying this would have reduced her to hysterics. But Arjun noted with pride and a touch of sadness, that all it did to her now was to make her breathe deeply.

"I didn't say anything. I kept looking at him. He then folded his hands before me, as if asking for forgiveness."

How can that rectify anything he did to you.. Arjun thought savagely but refrained from reacting.

"His eyes filled up and tears started flowing down. All the while, he just folded his hands and looked at me. At that moment of time, I finally understood that he himself had no answers, no explanation to why he did this. So, after a while, I did something I never expected myself to do."

"What?" Arjun asked, a bit concerned.

"I told him that I forgive him."

For a while none of them spoke. Arjun inhaled deeply.

"That was a - magnanimous gesture! What made you say it, and how do you feel now?"

She looked outside the window of the cabin, staring into nothingness. "I went through hell after what he did to me. But I am getting better every day. I have therapy, I have the full support of my family and my friends. So I feel I am blessed. But he has something worse in store for him. The jail in which he lives, is nothing compared to the prison in which his mind will stay from now. I saw remorse and regret in his eyes that day, and I know that they both will stay with him for a long time. So, I did the least I could do, and that is tell him that I forgive him."

Arjun was deeply impressed with her logic.

"As to how I feel, I feel - liberated. I feel like a thorn that had been piercing my heart has finally been removed. I feel free, Sir. I feel light after a long, long time."

The tears came again but this time Arjun knew they were tears of relief and respite from all the suffering and hatred she had borne in her mind. He allowed her to cry for some time.

And then, magic of all the magics, she smiled. She actually smiled for the first time in his office, in the four months of therapy she had been taking. He felt like shouting 'Yay!' to the whole world but decided it would come off as totally unprofessional of him.

"There is another thing I wanted to tell you. Something good, this time." She smiled yet again and he smiled back at her.

"This psychiatrist could do with all the good news you can give!" He said cheerfully.

"I am ready to think about being in a relationship."

Is it too soon, he thought in apprehension.

"Not that I am immediately going to get married or anything like that. I believe in taking small steps. So, I just registered myself on a marriage portal. And I have given all the information about me there." She looked at him, as if seeking his approval.

"That's a bold move, I have to say." He said cautiously.

"I know. It does feel like too soon, but at the end of the day, I am just like any other person, wanting to love and to be loved. So, for now, I am all about meeting people. Hopefully someone who is meant for me will come into my life at the right time." She said with a slight smile.

"You know how happy it makes me to hear words like 'love' and 'hope' from you?? You so deserve both of this, and much, much more! I am proud to say that you are doing really, really well. You have come a long way from the first silent session, and I see better and joyful times for you ahead."

She smiled shyly.

"So, it looks like you won't be needing my services any more now!" He said with his eyebrows raised.

For a second, she looked like her former self - wide-eyed, panicked and afraid. But the look was gradually replaced by one of acceptance. She nodded her head.

"I want  you to know that anytime you feel the need for therapy, please don't hesitate to seek out help." He said gravely. "Also remember that you deserve to be happy, to be at peace and everything good in life. Don't convince yourself otherwise, okay?"

He got up from his seat. To his pleasure, she extended her hand to him, the first time she had sought out human touch after the incident. He shook her hand warmly and escorted her out of the cabin, hoping and praying that she would never ever feel the need for therapy again.