From the Frying Pan into the Fire

Continued from The Day Of The Fight…

They both got inside the lift to go home.

“Dad, are you really sure about this?” Satish asked again with a tensed expression.

“How many times do you need assurance? Trust me, this is the best and the only way to get the females to talk to each other again.” Raman replied with confidence.

“But why do we need to sacrifice ourselves for this?”

“Satish, listen to your dad. He knows stuff. Before you go to sleep today, you will be thanking me for this master plan. Another piece of advice – when it comes to ensuring peace at home, every sacrifice is worth it!”

“Ha… you and your quotes…” Satish said with a chuckle but immediately took on a serious expression when the lift reached their floor.

“Come on quick!” Raman eagerly got out from the lift.

“Uh.. Dad? Don’t mind, but can you appear to be less exuberant and enthusiastic? You look way too happy for someone who is going to be executed.”

Raman paused and stared at Satish thoughtfully. “You know what, you are right! That was smart thinking… Now I am sure that you are my son.”

“Dad!” Satish exclaimed in irritation and followed Raman who had now assumed the air of someone feeling great remorse.

“Kusum, please come to the front room. There is something that I and Satish wish to say.” Raman pleaded with his wife who was lying on the bed with her arm folded across her eyes.

“If this is about the fight that we had today, I don’t want to speak about it.” She muttered.

“It is definitely not about the fight. There is something we wish to tell both of you.”

“Oh, all right.” She slowly got up and sat cross-legged on the bed. “Why does she take everything personally?” She exclaimed with anger suddenly.

 You said you don’t want to talk about the fight… Raman almost reminded her, but he wisely refrained from saying anything. He felt that reminding that to her would somehow make matters worse. He opted for the easier path and looked at her very attentively, as if listening to her woes was the only thing that he wished to do.

“It seems that I have to think twice before speaking anything in this home.” She shook her head and muttered angrily.

Ah female, how I wish you would take this statement to heart! Raman thought wistfully but still kept quiet.

“All right, let’s leave. Blurt it out, both of you, whatever you want to say.” She got up from the bed to Raman’s immense relief and they both went to the front room.

Satish also was sailing on troubled waters in his room.

“Why does she have to keep comparing me with those too-perfect-to-be-true Bahus that they show in the tv serials? Why can’t I wear Sari like they wear, why can’t I do Pooja like they do… I am also human, how long can I endure this?” Ritu said tearfully.

Right, you are human. What am I, robot? Satish tried to keep his irritation at bay and said to her calmly. “I know. Just come to the front room. We won’t take much time.” Hopefully, Satish thought. The ordeal should get over within minutes after their confession.

“What exactly do you both wish to say? You are being very secretive today.” Ritu said suspiciously.

Oh my God, the female’s brain is on overdrive now! “Please come out before you start assuming anything!” Satish forgot to plead and urgently took her hand. They both came out of the room.

Satish viewed the scene. His mom was sitting on the sofa with folded hands and staring at the coffee table while Raman was pacing the room from one end to another with his hands held at his back. A little less of enthusiasm and more of remorse, Dad! Satish thought helplessly as he saw his dad bouncing on his heels almost gleefully.

“Ah, Satish and Ritu, you are here! Come Ritu, sit here.” Raman exclaimed while Satish tried to gesture to him to calm down.

“Not there, Beta. Sit on the sofa, here!” Raman gestured to Ritu who had intended to sit on a chair. With a pensive look at Kusum, she sat on the sofa, as far as possible from Kusum who acted as if she had not seen Ritu.

“All right ladies, there is something that I and Satish wish to confess!” Raman said, rubbing his hands together. Satish silently shook his head. Way too happy, dad, way too happy…

“Kusum, I told you that I had to go to see Sharmaji who is sick with fever. Well, firstly, Sharmaji is hale and hearty thankfully! He never had fever, you see!” Raman began earnestly. Kusum slowly released her arms and stared at Raman.

“I went to a hotel to have dinner.” Raman continued as Kusum’s eyes widened.

“After the fight that you and Ritu had, something made me follow you into the kitchen. My biggest fears came true when you went for the container of Moong Dal. I then knew that it would be the dreaded Khichdi today.”

Kusum looked at Raman with wonder and disbelief.

“See the climate, female. It’s so cold and breezy. Do you honestly expect me to eat Khichdi on a day like this?” Raman said with a pleading expression which only made Kusum’s eyes turn into stone.

“And that’s not all!” Raman said happily and gazed at Satish with a proud expression. “Satish will do the honours now.”

Satish looked at Raman with awe. You really killed it this time, Dad. He silently came to stand beside 

Raman and looked at Ritu who had her mouth opened and jaw dropped.

“Ritu, I too lied about having dinner at office. In fact, I had dinner with dad today at the hotel.” He said it all in a single breath as if eager to let it all out.

“What?” Ritu said in disbelief.

“You forgot to say what we ate, boy.” Raman thumped Satish’s shoulder happily.

“A minute, dad, to let it all sink in first?” Satish said in a low voice and looked at Raman with narrowed eyes.

“What is done, is done, Son. Kusum and Ritu, we both ate Butter Naan and Veg Kolhapuri curry. You know, the one which has two chillies designed beside it on the menu card.” Raman said with a smile. Satish couldn’t resist it this time and slapped his forehead.

“You ate spicy and butter – laden food in a hotel and you lied to us about it?” Kusum slowly got up from her seat, anger emanating from her very being.

“Yes.” Raman shrugged, though he appeared to be less exuberant than before.

“You let dad eat that food, knowing fully well that both butter and spice are forbidden for him?” Ritu asked a bit more dramatically than Kusum. Satish had the gals to nod and drop down his head.

There was silence in the room for few minutes.

Kusum and Ritu looked at each other at the same time and shook their heads. “What do we do with these guys, Ritu?” Kusum asked in frustration.

“I really don’t know Mom. We both try to make tasty yet healthy dishes only for their sake and they betray us in this manner!”

“All our efforts are wasted on these guys! Go and eat whatever you both want! Don’t come running to us if you get sick!” Kusum scolded both the men who were now looking really downcast.

“Come Beta, let us take a walk in the lawn garden. At this moment, I can’t stand the presence of these two guys!” Kusum said and with a long and angry look at both the men, Ritu and Kusum left the house.

“What did I say? What did I tell you! Am I the expert or not!” Raman exclaimed loudly with happiness and pride. When Satish didn’t comment or give any reaction, he shook his shoulders and asked, “What’s wrong, boy? Our plan worked! The females have ended their feud! Ah blessed peace, how badly did I long for Thee!” Raman exclaimed dramatically and made Satish smile.

“I have a bad feeling about this, Dad. Let’s not do it again, ok. “Satish said slowly and left for his room while Raman just shrugged and ran towards the tv set. He grabbed the remote and switched on the sports channel which he had been longing to see the whole day.

“I need some grocery items. I have mentioned in this list.” Kusum handed over the list to Raman after they all had breakfast the next morning. Both the females were still mad at the guys but were on speaking terms with each other now.

“All right.” Raman took the list and scanned it. He frowned, and read it again.

“Hey, you seem to have made a mistake. You have written 3 kgs of Moong Dal. We don’t buy that much at a time, isn’t it?” He reminded her cheerfully.

“Oh, but we will, this time.” Kusum smiled sweetly at him and gave a victorious look to Ritu who was tapping her fingers lightly at the kitchen counter and looking at Raman and Satish alternatively with a reserved smile.

“I don’t understand.” Raman said in a confused tone.

“Khichdi, for the next ten days… For lunch and dinner...” Kusum uttered the words with finality.

“No!” Raman gasped and looked at Satish who was looking at Kusum and Ritu with a dumbfounded expression on his face.

“It won’t matter whether any of your friends are ill, Dad. And you Satish, whether you had dinner at office or not, you cannot escape your quota of Khichdi for dinner for the next ten days.” Ritu said with a fierce smile.

Leaving both the guys to accept their fate, the two ladies gave a hi-fi to each other and holding hands, left the kitchen.